My top 20 list of what to do before you get your house on the market.
1. If you have wallpaper borders, it’s not ok.
2. If you have the light fixtures from Home Depot that look like boobs…. no. Just no.
3. What’s the outside of your house look like from the street? Power washing, window washing, river rock landscaping and grading and FLOWERS make for great curb appeal.
4. Does your screen door look like a rusted out tetanus magent? Get a new one.
5. What’s your front door look like? Do you love it? If you don’t, chances are other people won’t either. Paint is cheap.
6. For goodness sake replace dead lightbulbs. It’s not that hard. I promise.
7. Can I see every toddler fingerprint and doggy’s nose print on every window? WINDEX is your friend.
8. Do I need to duck when I go in your basement because I’m scared of all the spiderwebs in the ceiling? Sweep them away! Make your basement NON TERRIFYING.
9. Does every buyer who comes into your home want to be regaled with every family photo you have? Um, no. They don’t. If your house is screaming “THIS is MY HOUSE” they won’t be able to emotionally picture it as theirs.
10. Come on. Clean the freaking kitty litter box.
11. Do you have vertical strip blinds circa 1991? Don’t make me come over there with a screwdriver and a crowbar. Because I will. I really will.
12. Clean your &$@! house. If you can’t do it at least throw money at the problem.
13. Does your master bedroom look like a room from the Delta Phi house or Chip and Joanna’s house? More Joanna. Less kegger.
14. People like alive things. This does not include old dusty curling ivy you’ve had laying on top of your kitchen cabinets for like 12 years. Fresh flowers.
15. Brown is not a good color for bathrooms. Don’t argue with me. I’m right.
16. Target is your friend.
17. Holy crap enough with the Glade plug ins. Go with NICE soy candles or get an essential oil diffuser and diffuse lemongrass.
18. A bowl of baby Twixs on the counter never hurt anyone
19. Don’t ignore outdoor space. People like to congregate outside around fire pits, etc. Even if they don’t like it, they like to think they do and they like to imagine being the kind of person who drinks wine around a fire pit. Help them with the vision.
20. If you are missing the gene that knows how to do items 1-19, just ask me for help. Getting houses ready to list is MY FAVORITE THING. I know EXACTLY WHAT TO DO to your house to get it sold fast and for the most money possible. 
The Girl, the Homes, the Stories 